Socks. Thrilling, huh?
But here we are, about to delve through the many layers of dirty laundry and into dis-pairing depths as we expose the saga of the sock’s story!
Yep, The Sock, somehow, became this fortnight’s conversation (and side venture into procrastination) for this post. So, let’s hop to it!
So, What Is The Sock?
It’s a foot cover. That’s it. We can all go home now.
Why? Do you want more?
Well then, why don’t you put up them socked-feet for this looong interwoven saga as we strip back the story on the sock.
Where Did The Sock Stumble In From?
Once upon a time in a land far, far away…
The word Socc meant ‘light slipper’ was what started it.
Not to make a laughing-sock out of this… (Tweet this)
Not to make a laughing-sock out of this invention, but it was designed purely for functionality that quickly evolved into its own sock-style.
How Odd Are Socks?
Basically, the sock was an item of material to wrap the foot. It was a practise well-used by early Eastern European Soldiers to cushion their boots until 2013!!
The original socks were handmade from leather and or animal hair… ew.
The oldest museum exhibit is an odd-sock dated back from ancient Egypt.
The Status Of The Sock
Not to get your socks-in-a-knot, but the sock was considered a luxury item worn only by the wealthy and wannabe nobilities throughout history. Yes, they turned the sock into a status symbol. Royals weren’t all about ruling the land. Nah ah. It was all about the socks. Can’t you just picture those royal court groupies cruising palace corridors with their elaborate patterned socks?
Not to get your socks-in-a-knot but… (Tweet this)
And for some, socks are part of their religious ceremonies, based upon the type of sock worn, by whom, and how they symbolically wash those socks.
What Makes The Sock?
Before the era of the sock-knitting machines stepping in socks were hand woven, knitted, or darned. The hearth was the place to sew and hang those hand-washed socks like Christmas! Or do they call that the Christmas stocking?
Sock materials of today are cotton, cashmere, silk, fine wool, and high-tech synthetic materials.
For those environmentally conscious there are the biodegradable, pesticide-free, bamboo socks. It’s fast-growing compared to the water-guzzling cotton producing socks.
Nylon continues to be the main ingredient for socks. Because of Nylon, socks went under a huge revolutionary make-over using this magical man-made material in the late 1930s.
The Higher Purpose Of The Lowly Sock
Besides getting in touch with your inner Fred Astaire as you slide across clean floors in a stylish sock-slide…
The obvious is that socks keep feet and those twinkly toes warm as part of the frost-bite-avoidance plan. They’re like mittens for feet. Not normally a topic for discussion when living outback of Australia.
Also, they’re worn for protection. Socks create a barrier to stop the rubbing, callusing, and blistering of skin against leather shoes.
Ever get in touch with your inner Fred Astaire as you slide across clean floors in stylish sock-slide… (Tweet this)
The Icky Sock Stuff
(Look away—or skip to the next section for those made of the soft-sock-stuff.)
One important reason for wearing socks is the huge hygienic benefits in keeping feet fresh. Yep, feet sweat a lot, and not allowing for the sweat-factor in your shoes causes issues like foot fungus. Hello athlete’s foot, anyone? (Are you cringing like I am as I write this?)
Using fresh clean socks can combat against the shoe-pong. They also increase the life of that shoe–especially sports shoes! (Do not picture stinky gym shoes… do not picture stinky gym shoes… Darn it!)
Sock Stereotypes
To make a long sockstoryshort, sock-styles are mostly about the lengths. The general rule is the longer the boot the longer the socks.
The varying lengths are:
No-show to Ankle Socks
Used mostly for gym shoes, trainers or those precious Vans!
Mid-calf Length Socks
Commonly used for those wearing jeans or slacks.
Knee Height Socks
Usually signifies a uniform, i.e. school or sports uniform.
Thigh-high Socks
Worn mostly by females. Some use them to play out a daddy-fetish in their socksual play. But then anything above the knees to the thigh slips into (ha) the stocking category of undergarments.
Insulated Socks
Thermals socks are for by those living in Icelandic conditions. Hello, the Vikings were a huge fan of this must-have accessory!
Bed Socks
Perfect for those cold chilly nights while your toes are cosy and warm in your big pair of sloppy hand knitted roomy bed socks. As a child, they are normally worn while sipping hot chocolate listening to bedtime stories about socks. But as a grown-up, who can resist those sloppy socks that match the PJ’s when you just want to play sloth while suffering a Bridget Jones moment?
Hiking Socks
They weave these thick socks with the magic of wicking. Wicking is a synthetic material that draws and distributes sweat from the skin. Trust me, you’ll know the difference on this one!
A good pair of hiking socks cushions and insulates the foot to the boot. If you go hiking and buy decent boots, please, please, invest in a decent pair of hiking socks. For those long hikes carry a spare pair and check for holes as part of your pre-hike-packing routine.
Also, many tradesmen in my part of Australia prefer these types of socks, especially in summer.
Dress Socks
These are the thin delicate conservative sort of sockery-standard worn to blend with the suit or tuxedo, popular for weddings.
There are strict specifics to this form of conservative sock-style. Socks must blend as close to the colour of the shoe and slacks worn. Patterns are conservatively minimal. Mi-ni-mal!
Compression Socks
Compression socks are tight, long, thin, and uncomfortable. They’re used for post-surgery to combat blood clotting and feet swelling, or cramping or fatigue… Sorry, not a doctor on this one.
The Sock Benefits
Socks can hide scars, blemishes, and bruises. They also hide those unkempt toenails that remind you of Dracula’s uncle. You know the type? The one who’s kept in a coffin for the last one hundred years without a pair of toenail clippers. Hey, how tricky would it be to perform a pedicure, trimming those darn things in the dark closed-up coffin?
How tricky would it be to perform a pedicure, trimming toenails in the dark while inside a closed coffin? (Tweet this)
Moving on…
Many children have worn socks on their hands while suffering chicken pox to stop scratching in their sleep.
Some people use their socks like a wallet when they have no pockets.
Socks are unchanging in their approach to weight loss or weight gain—they’ll always fit!
That Darn Sock And Sandals Scandal!
Not to re-live in those historic socks but…
It’s quite dis-paring at how many thousands of articles are kicking around about this topic within the Western World about wearing socks and sandals at once. In Japan (with their split-toe socks) it’s considered normal to wear socks with sandals. Yet, somehow, this irksome tradition began with the Ancient Romans traipsing around in woolly socks while wearing their fancy Roman Sandals. Huh.
And we’re still talking about it?
Can’t we just suck-it-up and disallow this un-sock-like behaviour to persist. (Did you just read that twice? hehehe.)
I bet Albert Einstein never felt like a heel for not wearing socks with his sandals because the man refused to wear socks. At all times. It’s rumoured he quit the sock-wearing habit during childhood.
The Sock-Story
So, in the spinning yarn of this sock-story, and yes, they mention socks in many a tall tale throughout printed history…
Shakespeare complained about the villainous smells of socks in his play ‘The Merry Wives of Windsor.’
Dr Seuss has his famous fun fable of the Fox in Socks.
And there are many children’s stories read aloud at bedtime for those wearing bed socks.
I wrote a story involving socks and sports. Why? Where was my head at!
Rockin’ Those Socks
There was the Sock Hop that was a fad for teenagers in the United States created in the late 1940s. To not scuff those precious gymnasium floors, students removed their shoes to dance in their socks at these school dances. Thus, creating the sock hop at the birth of the Rock ’n Roll era of the 1950s that is still similar to today school socials. Sock on!
Star Socks
You can literally walk over anyone by wearing your favourite famous actor’s face on your socks these days. Who would you wear?
And so now let’s mention those sock-worthy stars and their sock-movie-moments…
Besides the great, late, Audrey Hepburn who wore ankle socks as part of her everyday wardrobe making it part of her earlier Hollywood brand. Similar to the wardrobe worn in her film Funny Face.
Risky Business—that epic sliding entrance in the socks scene. Come on, how many have dared to do this when home alone?
The Wizard of Oz—that crazy witch and her striped socks. You know the scene where the house landed on the witch showing just those red sparkly shoes and striped socks. It’s in the original version.
Monsters Inc—the famous sock scene where a child’s lost sock gets stuck to a monster. This poor panicked creature believes it’s a terrible disease-carrying human-threat to his monster-life! So, during the 2319 emergency, brave monsters in hazmat-suits destroy that off-white sock nuclear sock.
Aaaaand, the last mention to where a poor sock made someone’s day goes to…
Dobby and his sock-shock for freedom in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. It’s where clever Harry slips a sock to save a sole! Ha. Soul.
Socks in TV land
Far too many to mention. But…
The Sock That Shall Not Be Named (in the headlines)
This is the sock that rocks those televised sex-scenes and worthy of a mention.
In True Blood, how many times did we see Jason Stackhouse—wearing socks, naked! But I’m not talking about those socks… because this show was also famous for its frequent use of the cock sock. They even tied it with a bow!
There, I mentioned it…
The Cock Sock!
(*Gasp)
It’s a small (although many will brag its big) sock worn by male actors for nude scenes.
The Walking Dead’s bad boy, Daryl Dixon, (aka Norman Reedus) openly talks about his cock-sock-experience for Season 8!
Sock Puppets Hall Of No-Shame:
There have been many sock puppets that have crept into our lives. Murdoch’s talking dog (sock puppet) is in the original A-Team. The Family Guy had a sock war, sock monkeys, and sock monsters.
Then there’s Lambchop, a sock puppet whose 40-year career began on American television in 1957.
Now, for the sock-shock that I’ll give to you straight is that…
Kermit Started Was A Sock!
Back in 1955 they’d made Kermit from a green sock with googly eyes glued on! The make-over we know and love today occurred in 1969.
Sock Day’s
Like a burst laundry bag of odds socks spilling across the floor… (Tweet This)
Yup, it’s a thang! Like a burst laundry bag of odds socks spilling across the floor, there are many national days to celebrate the sock. Starting with, and not in any sock-drawer-order…
National Lost Sock Day
On May 9, this annual international day of mourning is for those socks you’ve lost. It’s a day where many wear their odd socks with pride.
National No-Sock Day
Held just before the National Lost Sock Day, on May 8th.
National Sock Day
On December 4th you too can celebrate the magical pairing of socks. Like a marriage of the everlasting pairing of migrating geese, that one pair of socks stick together no matter how much dirty laundry they’ve been through!
Celebrate the magical pairing of socks that stick together wash after wash, no matter how much dirty laundry they’ve been through! (Tweet this)
International Odd Sock Day
To stamp out stigmas against mental health, they run this day in the UK and Australia as a fundraising event.
Happy Socks Day
Happy Socks Day coincides with Downs Syndrome Day to raise funds for crucial support. Sock-prenuer, John Lee Cronin, has Downs Syndrome and is smashing stereotypes in the sock business he shares with his dad. John’s Crazy Socks look great, and with each sale, they donate towards helping others with special needs. John’s message is simple—his socks spread happiness.
The Sock’s Expansion Into New Worlds:
Let’s slide back home and into the kitchen starting with…
Sock Soup
Not to over stir the sock-pot on this one too much, but I’m talking about how socks can be a random ingredient for that sock-stew.
How many cartoons and comedic black-and-white TV shows have you seen where the Sock ends up in the soup? Or they mention that this dish tastes like old socks? How do they know what old sock tastes like?
Socks have been used in stocks and soups for centuries. It’s common practice to put assorted herbs and spices inside a fine mesh sock that allows for a flavour infusion without the need to strain later. Sock soup anyone?
The Wind Has A Sock
The most common version of the windsock is the conical tube found at airfields to indicate wind direction.
Then the windsock took it one step further and created…
Windsock Puppets
These are the grownups version of the hand-held sock-puppet (not). They’re those gi-normous air-filled plastic puppets normally spotted twerking in front of a used car yard or at a new store opening.
Windsock Kites
Famous in Japan they look like koi kites that resemble flying rainbow fish. Which brings me to….
Sock-it-up and Let’s Go Fishing!
Who can forget seeing the cartoon image of a fisherman catching a soggy sock at the end of his hook?
Besides the obvious, you can buy those special Father’s Day socks showing many fishing themes. But did you know they regularly use socks in fishing?
Read on…
The Bait Sock
I’ve used them and swear by them. It’s where you fill a fine mesh sock with stinky soft bait, close up the end and let it out on the line. Without floating away that contained smorgasbord aroma attracts many nosy participants! It’s like a stock-soup-sock for the sea. The bait sock is effective in crab pots too.
Fishing Rod Socks
Rods aren’t cheap, and most (should) come with socks to protect these flexing gadgets.
Fishing Reel Socks
Yep, again, it’s all about protecting that extremity that juts off that rod. Kind of like a foot to a leg, huh?
Now, normally most men don’t wear socks while indulging in this waterside event, yet there are a lot of socks mentioned in this recreational pastime!
Pet Socks
I’m not talking about the crafty pet-rocks, but pet names. I don’t know too many people who call their loved one ‘Sweet socks’ as a nickname. It is possible?
Many pets, worldwide, answer to the man of Socks. Typically, it’s a furry creature (dogs/ cats/ horses even) that have white sock-like feet.
The most famous cat called Socks belonged to the Ex-President Clinton. Socks was the first American Presidential Pet to move into the Whitehouse. Hillary Clinton wrote a children’s story about that cat and called it ‘Dear Socks’.
Besides those beloved pets posing in socks on Facebook, did you know horses not only wear shoes, but they also wear socks too? Racehorses wear socks to protect their legs for race days. Horses wear them for trail riding and training and playing their various sports like polo.
Sporting Those Socks
We’ve seen them worn in many sports. Normally, they’re knee-high coloured socks that make part of the team’s uniform. Footballers wear them. Hockey players wear them as a convenient place to hide those shin guards.
But what about sporting teams and socks?
The Red Sox
The Red Sox is American baseball team based in Boston, USA, that has a pair of Red Socks as their emblem. They’ve won 9/13 world champions and are the current 2018 world champions! Go Socks!
The Chicago White Sox
The Chicago White Sox (what is it with baseball and socks?) trademark today is just the word, SOX. It used to be a white sock with wings back in 1949!
Picking Up Those Socks:
Nope, I’m not your mother telling you to tidy up that sock-sodden-room. I’m talking about those cheesy pickup lines using socks. Because we know how many puns I’ve woven through above. (You hate me, right?)
So, here are three cheesy winners. Let me know if they work.
- “We’re not socks. But I think we’d make a great pair.”
- “Allow me to pull up your socks. I don’t want to risk you falling for someone else.”
- “I wanna live in your socks so I can be with you every step of the way.”
(Gimme a bucket!!)
In Or of the 0dd-Sock Syndrome
Where does that singular sock go? Is there some sock-sucking-monster that scoops in to devour that single sock when in the washing machine?
Or is that sock lost?
Or is that sock just lost in that jumble mash in your drawer of socks? Where it then becomes a part of your morning sock-drawer-surprise as a lucky dip ritual to wear odd socks for the day as part of your hidden personality?
Or you’re not bothered pairing socks up, saving if for that annual event for when your mother visits. Then you’ll you sit and stew as you get down with that sushi-sock roll sorting out that sock drawer.
What To Do With Those Odd Socks?
A-pair-ently you can make stuff, and a good source to search is on Pinterest where you can make puppets!
Or make a bag for bags, like a stash-holder of plastic bags?
Or you can grow things in them besides fungus—how about moss!
Or it’s a place to stash your money and jewels at the bottom of your sock drawer.
Or it’s used as a well-recognised International signal by leaving that spare sock on the doorknob to not be disturbed.
Or you can make a rope by tying those socks together to escape your parent’s/boyfriend’s/ housemate‘s domain.
Or you could make future Christmas socks?
Or fill that odd sock with rocks to hurl like an Olympic shot-putting-hammerer into one stone throwing new sport! Talk about being between a sock and a hard place!
So there you have it. It’s not all about being a piece of clothing you slip on before those shoes, now is it?
What’s The Point To This Silly Sock-Saga?
Why bother with this toe-curling heelsome (Yep, I went there) debate of the story of the sock?
Besides being a staple to the wardrobe and number one accessory to shoes, the simplicity of the sock as a prop is found in a few of my stories:
In UNPLANNED PARTY, our introverted heroine has a habit of tripping over her own feet, and sliding in her shoes is like a newborn calf trying to stand that first time. Not pretty. Good thing there’s a delicious Detective on her case to help, maybe?
But mostly, this article was all due to my rabbit-hole sock-slide in the name of research for my novel, the Football Whisperer. If you read it, you’ll discover the connection and the rest of the amazing characters, and you’ll soon understand how it inspired this post.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to sort out my sock drawer.
**All still images relating to this post’s topic are via the talented & fabulous photographers at https://unsplash.com/ Thanks guys!
#footballWhisperer #Escape2HEA #wordjourney
